Writings

Since the magical year of 2020, I have been listening to the J-Pop band NONA REEVES. While their music might seem generic to some, I still really enjoy it, and it’s a welcome and catchy break from the other types of music I listen to. However, this post won’t be about NONA REEVES themselves, as much as it will be about cases of availability similar to the music of NONA REEVES.

You see, the band doesn’t seem to be particularly popular outside of Japan. Beyond that one Parappa anime remix of one of their songs, their catalog seems to be really obscure and hard to find in the west, especially their post-2001 output. I recently found out that all of their newer music IS in fact available on services like Spotify and YouTube Music, but it is nearly impossible to listen to if you’re not in Japan. As someone who extensively uses Spotify and YouTube for music on the go, this was really disappointing and frustrating to me, to the point where I uploaded some of their albums to the wider YouTube sphere, for my own convenience and for other people to find and listen to.

It isn’t just NONA REEVES however that suffers from being unavailable beyond it’s origin country. Games and some of the more obscure media of the movie and music variety have been somewhat difficult to access for decades before the Internet age, and even a period during said age. And I always hated this practice.

Games were more understandable back when analog TVs were the norm and varying frequencies of equipment would result in an unviewable image. However, this practice continued well into the 7th generation of gaming, when digital TVs that could handle both 50/60hz becoming more widely available, with the Xbox 360 and Wii being the prime examples of this. Hell, the main motivator for the development of the Xbox 360 emulator Xenia was the creator not being able to play imported titles on his consoles. The PS3 was region free in the same generation, so there really was no genuine reason to region lock consoles anymore, other than having total control, which corporations would seemingly never give up a sliver of when it comes to their consoles.

Movies and music however? Less excusable, technologically speaking. Culturally, some culture-specific media would be difficult for other audiences to engage with back in the day, but they didn’t even give those audiences the option to engage with it. Whether that’s out of ignorance, greed, lack of budget, or biases, the initial reason varies, but the end result is the same. Less media for the people. And it sucks.

Thankfully, region locking isn’t nearly as prevalent of an issue as it used to be. The internet has allowed greater access to content from other regions, and companies have done much better jobs with allowing others to engage with media that didn’t release in their region for one reason or another. And that only makes it sting more, when some labels or companies still have their head up their ass in the name of “tradition” and STILL do this kind of bullshit.

One particular country that still seems to be fond of region locking is Japan. I already named the NONA REEVES example, but one other example I’m thinking of at the moment is the internet radio service Radiko, which is flat-out unavailable outside of Japan, unless you use a VPN or a browser extension to bypass the draconian restrictions. Normally some obscure service being unavailable wouldn’t be that bothersome, but Radiko, if I remember correctly, is the main service of Japanese internet radios, with only a small handful of globally available stations. So if you grew a liking to, or are interested in, Japanese internet radio, then you’re basically screwed and can’t access the vast majority of that space, because some asshole thought it would be brilliant if people were shown the door for not being in the correct country. (Not even really that effective when you can bypass it with a FUCKING BROWSER EXTENSION.)

Thinking about region locking has given me another brilliant example of Gaben’s “Piracy is a service problem” quote being eternally correct. If the consumer is given no choice in accessing the media they’re interested in, why should people shed a tear for your product or service being inevitably pirated? If you genuinely care, put in the effort to make your stuff available, and I’ll pay up. Games and movies have both made strides in being more accessible, either with availability or streaming, and therefore, for the time being, reducing the amount of piracy done on them. Of course, pirates will always exist, whether that’s due to lack of money or some other form of inaccessibility, but that’s a more complex topic than corporations would like you to believe. However, I don’t remember the last time I pirated a game unless I had a good reason to. I’m more compelled to give money where it’s due because of how easy it is to access what I want. And the more noticeable lack of region locking in the present has also done it’s part in this downtrend.

However, with streaming services being more compelled to become the internet version of cable TV, and older games being more and more unavailable as time goes on, one has to wonder if this downtrend will go back up in due time. And while region locking isn’t really comparable, it is funny and scary at the same time to wonder if it’s going to go through a similar fracture process. Probably not, but you never know. For now, I’m just happy that I can access more stuff legally whenever I want. NONA REEVES’ music notwithstanding.

The title of this post is a question I’ve been having recently. In case you’re unaware, Grand Theft Auto: The Trilogy – Definitive Edition is a garbage, poorly-made “remaster” of the so-called 3D trilogy of Grand Theft Auto. It was based on the horrendously made mobile port codebase, and featured poorer graphics, terrible model “overhauls”, hilariously shoddy AI generated upscales, performance problems and glitches. Basically, it had the entire smorgasbord of awful game design and then some.

(Notice Ryder’s noodle arms. Thanks, Grove Street Games.)

On release, this piss poor attempt at re-selling 20-year old games with the same old engine under the hood but with a new renderer was rightfully called out for what it is. Many people were able to easily point out all of it’s constant glitches and faults, both technically and aesthetically, and was the subject of a lot of mockery, critique and memes for it’s entire lifetime. Almost.

Recently, with the new GTA VI trailer announcement, and even a new version on Mobile that re-introduced “Classic Lighting”, the general consensus of players seems to have shifted to a more positive one. For instance, the San Andreas DE Steam rating is now “Mostly Positive”, and many of the latest reviews are gloating about either how “good it is” or how “it’s actually not that bad”. And I simply find it baffling.

As someone who has spent tens, if not hundreds of hours playing these games, both before and after Definitive Edition’s release, I could instantly tell it was a sham and an inferior version of the games that I personally love to death. I even knew this was going to turn out poorly, after I found out who exactly made this version.

(For more detailed context, check out these videos from Vadim M. The TL;DR is that Grove Street Games, formerly known as War Drum Studios, was behind the terrible San Andreas mobile port, on which the Definitive Edition is based off of.)

And sure enough, my expectations were met, as the terrible ports were released in a terrible state and received terrible scores. To the surprise of, I guess the Rockstar faithful, but not to anyone who actually paid attention to the pre-release material. But now, almost everyone seems to, for some reason, love and defend this port, to the point where a GTA content creator I like to watch was called a “skinhead” for daring to criticize it. I wish I made that up.

So why doesn’t it deserve the newly-obtained admiration? Well, firstly, I completely dislike the idea of the “sell now, fix later” model that almost every AAA release seems to be doing now. People buy into hype, the game comes out as shit, people get angry, and then immediately forget everything that happened because “it’s good now”. They get so happy over it, that they defend the game to the bitter end and attack anyone who dares to point out the past wrongdoings of a soulless corporation that doesn’t see them as anything but walking dollars.

But, okay. Let’s say that they tried their best to fix it, 2 whole years after it originally came out and only on mobile for some reason. It still isn’t enough. It will never be enough. And that is because the problems of this version go all the way down to its fundamentals. Like I mentioned previously, the Definitive Edition is based off of the mobile version codebase, which was made by the same company, and is a terrible port with so many bugs and visual issues that even 1 and a half hour of video isn’t enough to show all of the faults of its Xbox 360 and PS3 versions, which are basically the same versions but with some extra bugs on top.

And it isn’t just functionally where their reliance on this bad codebase is permanently crippling DE. Aesthetically, it gutted a lot of the original systems of San Andreas, such as multiple weather presets for each area. Originally, the game had 16 weather presets, and they were all completely different. Now, there are only 4 presets, and even worse, they look the exact same. Even with Classic Lighting, they essentially only match the weather presets of Los Santos, and simply apply those presets to the other areas as well. So now we have green deserts at night.

For context, this is what it’s supposed to look like.

It’s the same deal in Las Venturas.

So they didn’t actually fix shit in the aesthetic department. Whether it was out of laziness, technical inability due to the shit codebase, or the expectation that no one would play or travel outside of LS is anyone’s guess. But hopefully it becomes crystal clear that there was nothing actually improved, and anyone that still wants to claim otherwise is either blind or a moron who doesn’t respect artistic integrity.

(If you wish to get more details about this particular issue, I recommend TJGM’s video on the topic.)

And lastly, I want to address that any actual bug fixes from the new mobile version that someone might point out were NEVER issues in the original game to begin with. They’re purely from this shit version and are essentially just patching what they fucked up. To give you an example: animated props, such as the Burger Shot in Verona Beach and the oil rigs in Las Venturas worked perfectly in the original, but were broken in the demaster and fixed later on mobile. People are essentially praising fixes for issues that were never a part of the actually good versions, which I simply find funny and depressing to think about.

So, I’m still left wondering: “Why do people like GTA Definitive Edition now?” None of the issues they fixed were part of the originals, and there are still massive downgrades present that will either never get fixed, or simply can’t be fixed. Polishing a turd will not make it anything other than a turd, and yet the fanboys still defend the turd as if it was anything more than a turd. They happily lick it up, and don’t question it. My hope is that you see the turd for what it is and simply walk around it, like any other person would.

NOTE: This post is meant to be a supplement for the original writeup, with many corrections and additions, therefore reading it first is mandatory to understand a lot of the context.

As you might have deduced from the original post, Only Up is a VERY bad clone of Getting Over It with no redeeming qualities whatsoever. However, I somewhat offhandedly mentioned something I will come clean about: I’ve never actually played Only Up. Yes, I know, how shocking that I’m talking shit about a game that looks terrible from the gameplay alone. However, I have good news for the potential naysayers who would like to discredit me for that fact alone: I have played the game! At least for a little bit.

I recently did a stream of myself playing the game, for the purpose of correcting any potential errors and adding to the original writeup I made, as well as to feel how it actually plays for myself. I didn’t expect to really have my mind changed that much, as I saw enough to understand how the game worked. Still, I figured I should give it a try. And wow, do I fucking hate it even more.

We’ll get to that shortly. But first, I’d like to mention something: a lot of the statements I provided in that post were based off some aspects that have since been updated by the developer. For example, the off-center camera has since been fixed with not only an option to center it, but also the ability to go first-person (albeit with a very low FOV). So yes, while some details were technically wrong, that really doesn’t matter when you consider how fucked the rest of the fundamentals still are.

Now, let’s talk about how it felt to actually play the game. Like I said, I didn’t expect to have my mind changed or my original points debunked, since again, a lot of it is fundamental to how the game works. There is one major thing however that I got wrong: there actually is commentary. You might be thinking, “well, it can’t be any good when we’re talking about Only Up, can it?” And you’re absolutely correct. The commentary is the most grating thing my ears have ever suffered through.

Like I said in the original post, a pointless commentary is worse than no commentary, because all it does is become grating white noise, since it has absolutely no substance. And that’s definitely the case for Only Up’s commentary. What sounds very much like a fucking AI voice is saying random “deep” quotes about #Society and some vague backstory and details about the main character from a first person perspective, implying this is the main character narrating. The latter actually sounds kind of interesting on its own, if it had any substantial relevance to the map, but again, it does not. All of the relevant narration is incredibly vague and serves as nothing but a pointless distraction. And to make it worse, unlike Getting Over It, the triggers for the commentary are not cleared after you pass a certain point. So if you fall all the way, you literally get to hear the commentary again, and it begins to drive you insane if you fall enough times. That includes the random music triggers, which have absolutely no purpose whatsoever and seem to be a very pale imitation of Getting Over It’s music triggers that trigger when you fall enough times. But Getting Over It actually has music relevant to the gameplay/themes. Here, it is literally put in there for no reason.

Beyond the commentary being pointless, the map is also still a mess, and it’s even worse than I imagined. My original criticisms of the map were its lack of safety nets and any purpose and connection to the commentary and/or message the game is trying to tell, and those still ring true. However, it is also godawful gameplay-wise. Many times I have constantly gone towards dead ends that knock me all the way to the beginning, due to the messy nature of the map. There is absolutely zero communication to the player about the proper way forward, which means a lot of the time you’ll stumble upon what looks like a fork in the road and end up going the wrong way.

And like I said previously, it’s still a mess, with free assets strewn everywhere because “platforming, lol.” At times it looks like a Roblox obby with the amount of random shit you have to platform. None of the sections are remotely memorable, and, like mentioned earlier, the efforts to tie them in somehow with the commentary are pathetic. They essentially boil down to quotes like “my grandpa used to work at a railroad” when you make it to a small train station, which can be seen as some sort of attempt to give a personal connection between the area and the main character, but there is literally no substance beyond that. Compare that to Getting Over It, which actually had commentary that was somewhat in-depth and very much related to the area you just reached, such as the commentary that would play when you reached Orange Hell.

And finally: the controls. I am going to officially go on record and say this is probably the worst game I’ve genuinely ever played, JUST for the controls alone. As I could tell from just WATCHING gameplay footage, the collision and movement looked horrendous, but I really didn’t grasp the true horror of how bad they actually were until I played it for myself. So many goddamn times did I bounce off a random ledge, or slipped off a ledge I JUST CLIMBED or tried to move forward only to somehow not go in the proper direction. It completely and utterly fails in this department in terms of not only just functionality, but also difficulty, because the difficulty doesn’t come from mastering the movement and physics. Like mentioned previously, the controls are your bog standard WASD + mouse scheme with basic movement. No, the difficulty comes from trying to not get fucked over by the shitty collision and climbing for the 67th time. Which, I don’t think I need to say, is a completely terrible way to design a difficult video game.

So, despite my lack of on-hands experience with Only Up initially, it seems that all my points are indeed correct. Outside of the inaccuracy of a lack of commentary (which I wish was actually the case after playing) in the original post, all of my complaints remained and were proven to be the case after playing a pretty lengthy session of this terrible, no-good, soulless NFT shill rage game. I’m going to repeat myself: AVOID this game at all costs, and play Getting Over It. Don’t even bother in the “haha, ironic” way, because it’ll still waste your time regardless.

To wrap this post up, I’m going to give you a good example of a game in the style of Getting Over It. While not successfully replicating the three-part formula, Jump King is a very well-made difficult platformer game with the DNA of Getting Over It. It’s lacking in commentary, but it makes up for it in the other two aspects. The controls and physics have the “wonky and difficult, but in a way you can master” aspect to them, and the map has many memorable sections and is very well-made, being actually made from scratch and not relying on free assets. If you’re looking for an alternative to Getting Over It in terms of challenge and memorability, it’s a very good game to choose for that. I may have been a bit hyperbolic when saying a game like this can’t be done without all three parts, but even later on in the original post I eventually said indirectly that you can make up for it by designing the other parts very, very well. However, I still believe that if you’re going to replicate all three parts, then you better do them well, otherwise all you’re going to make is a bad and soulless clone. And, sadly for the Only Up developer, that’s exactly what they ended up making.

If you hang around the interwebs, I don’t think the game Only Up should be unfamiliar to you. It’s made rounds on YouTube and Twitch like crazy in the past 2 months, and to this day is still gaining a fairly sizeable viewing on Twitch streams. No doubt that its insane difficulty and lack of room for making mistakes is the main drive of its popularity. These two things are almost always a good recipe for getting the popular tubers and streamers to play your game. However, I argue that this game did not deserve its popularity at all and is in fact one of the worst games I’ve ever seen.

Let’s start with a point of comparison: If you personally know me, you know that I somewhat like its inspiration, Getting Over It with Bennett Foddy.

Okay, maybe somewhat like is an understatement.

Point is, I love this game to death. I genuinely consider it to be one of the greatest games ever made, and has a strong and very real message to its players and viewers alike. And if you watched Getting Over It for even a little bit, you would know how it works: difficult controls, mistakes that are irreversible, a narrator that might drive you insane, and the game is prone to driving people angry. It’s very good material for rage compilations, no doubt.

However, there is more to it than the average Twitch streamer will ever point out. There are quite a few reasons why this game is as great as it is.

First: the controls. This game is mouse-operated, and the gameplay hinges on the fact, that it’s very difficult to maneuver the protagonist with the controls. While this is true for all first-time players, the controls aren’t as manic as some might be led to believe on first viewing. There is a real sense of progression and skill in learning the controls and getting better with them. And it’s not just on the first playthrough. A lot of people, including myself, might be hooked by the time they got at the end, despite the painful journey, and think to themselves: “How fast can I go the second time?” So they play through the second time. And then the third time. And then the fourth, the fifth, and so on and so forth. With each playthrough, you subconsciously pick up how the controls work, how the physics work and how to properly maneuver your way through each of the various sections. You can learn how to skip the slide portion. You can learn how to wall bounce to get out of certain situations. And many other tricks that can come in handy. If I can get good at these controls… literally anyone can. That is the real beauty behind Getting Over It’s design. Its controls are wonky, but in a way that you can intuitively get used to and use to your advantage.

Second: the map. In the commentary, Bennett talks about the art of B-games, and what they are: he describes them as “rough assemblages of found objects”. It’s a good descriptor for its inspiration, Sexy Hiking, and it also applies to Getting Over It’s map. Again, if you watched the game for even a tiny amount, you’ll notice how crazy the map looks with its random objects strewn everywhere with no rhyme or reason. However, it’s actually the opposite: the game’s manic use of objects and free assets has a clear and laid out reason. Bennett explains in the commentary, that the random objects are strewn about in this fashion not only because it’s supposed to be a B-game, but they and the game itself serve as a commentary on digital culture, consumerism of the internet, and the people’s unwillingness to consume content if it’s not fed to them directly and without thought. He even does a direct callout to the viewers of YouTube/Twitch content creators that recorded this game.

Beyond the message of the game giving the map its reason to be the way it is, it also created a lot of memorable scenery for the player. Parts of the map can be divided up into specific sections with their own unique sky colors and obstacles. I’m sure everyone recognizes the infamous “Orange Hell” with its orange sky and cabinet with an orange on top of it. Maybe you have a lot of memories of you struggling up “Devil’s Chimney”, the tight tunnel with lamps stuck to the walls. Perhaps it was the “Anvil Jump” that sticks out in your mind the most, with its snowy surroundings and steep wall that you need to jump up to. Whichever section is your favorite (or least favorite), all of them have one thing in common: they’re unique, surreal landscapes that make the game very memorable.

And finally, despite the infamous reputation of the game: there are in fact many safety nets strewn throughout the game to not make your mistakes too punishing to make you want to quit for good. Yes, given enough effort, you can actually mess up so badly that you’re kicked to the beginning, but that is quite an extreme fail. A lot of the time, a mistake in a given section only kicks you back about 10-15% of the way. You might argue that it makes the difficulty a joke, but don’t let that surface level approach fool you: it’s still incredibly difficult on your first playthrough. It’s just that the difficulty is balanced in a way that makes it engaging to keep going.

Without the groundwork in form of a real meaning and purpose behind this map, as well as great design that makes it memorable and fun (in a twisted way, LOL), it would simply be a bland map with copy pasted free assets for the sake of laziness, forgettable scenery that made no sense, and made incredibly annoying to traverse. (cough cough, Golfing Over It, cough) And that is why Getting Over It’s map is so brilliant.

Third: the commentary. While playing through the game, the voice of Bennett Foddy would accompany on your quite painful journey. Many would find this irritating, but others, like myself, would find it soothing and intriguing to keep going to see what else he had to say. Regardless of your feelings on the commentary, it is hard to deny that, if you listen to it, you can feel actual soul being put into this game. Initially, Bennett is being somewhat mockful of you at the start of the game. Whenever you make mistakes, he makes remarks or cites quotes that may be taken as jabs towards the player’s inability to progress. (Fun fact: he mentions in a podcast I believe, that the quotes were taken from common responses on the internet towards people who’ve suffered some kind of loss.) You might laugh at them. You might rage at them. They might even make you cry. But he’s always there to try and motivate you to keep climbing. As the game progresses, Bennett’s commentary begins to be a lot more respectful towards you, the player, and you eventually feel some sort of connection with him. His commentary on digital culture and consumerism might resonate with you, and make you eager to listen to his thoughts on these topics. By the end of the game, he tells you that he is proud of how far you’ve come in this journey, giving you a huge sense of accomplishment for sticking it out to the end. The amount of consideration put into the commentary is what makes it great, and is, in my opinion, a vital part of the game if you intend to experience it to its fullest.

All of these components work together to make the brilliant game that is Getting Over It. Many other games that have been inspired by it have tried to emulate its key parts, but have either neglected one of them or outright failed to make them properly. Either the controls are frustrating in an anti-fun way, or the map has no deeper meaning and is incredibly frustrating, or the commentary is pointless or even missing entirely. The truth is, Getting Over It is great specifically because it has all three parts and it executes them perfectly. You can’t have a good game with this formula without one or the other. It NEEDS to have all of them. Otherwise, all you’re left with is an unsatisfying and forgettable experience with a challenge factor that feels either unfair or not worth the effort.

Now that the point of comparison is established, it is quite impressive that Only Up manages to execute NONE of these components competently in any capacity.

We’ll begin dissecting exactly why this game is shit by working with the same points that I described in my earlier dissection of Getting Over It.

The controls: This game uses your standard WASD + mouse scheme that your typical third-person perspective game uses. If you remember what I was describing earlier in the controls section of my Getting Over It dissection, you’re probably thinking to yourself that this misses the point of its controls by literally giving you a bog standard scheme. But don’t worry, that is the LEAST of its problems.

The game tries to make up for its lack of difficulty in its controls by making the platforming itself the central focus of the gameplay. Unlike Getting Over It, the camera is set behind the player and you move in three dimensions. Or at least, you would if the controls functioned correctly. The camera is set at a weird angle that is not perfectly behind your character, so you can never properly judge where and how you’re supposed to jump, which is a great fucking idea in a game that RELIES on precise jumping and maneuvering on tiny platforms.

Unlike in Getting Over It, you don’t feel any potential mistakes as being your fault. You don’t feel engaged with the world or game to keep going. You always feel like the game cheated you out of your progress because of how poorly it’s designed. The factor of being hooked to replay it after completion feels nonexistent, considering the unrewarding journey due to the aforementioned shittiness of the whole game. And because the controls are so simple, and the platforming janky as all hell, you don’t feel any actual skill developing. 90% of the platforming boils down to luck and whether the shitty collision of the map will let you climb to the next platform. Which brings me to…

The map: This map sucks. Plain and simple right off the bat. There is absolutely nothing coherent or memorable about this map, it is just random objects strewn about to make a path. There isn’t a single section that sticks out as a particular favorite, and this feels like a 16 year old’s first Unreal project with free assets grabbed from the marketplace.

The usage of free assets is very much mirroring Getting Over It, but unlike in that game, there is no rhyme or reason to it, no deeper meaning and no message. It is quite literally just random. Much like the aforementioned Golfing Over It, the free assets are put in here as an excuse to be lazy and to try and emulate Getting Over It, while completely missing the fucking point of why they were used.

And to make it worse, there are ZERO safety nets. You can lose a quarter or more of your progress due to the godawful jank platforming and be left with nothing but a feeling of being completely robbed. Maybe the commentary can at least give the map some sort of meaning?

The commentary: What commentary? No, seriously. It’s actually fucking unbelievable that this is lacking one of the crucial goddamn parts of the formula. I’m serious. There is NOTHING in terms of any commentary whatsoever. It might have been less of a sin (since a pointless commentary is worse than no commentary at all) if the rest of the elements were executed a lot better, but as you can probably tell from the earlier dissections, that is not the case at all. I mentioned earlier that the map is totally arbitrary and has free assets for the sake of free assets, but it could have at least tried to make up for it in some form with the commentary to potentially add the lacking message and meaning to the map. But no, there is nothing. Zip. Zilch. Nada. I really can’t comment on anything else in here, because there’s nothing for me to comment on to begin with. Good game.

So, to conclude: Only Up is a terrible asset flip rage game, purely designed to milk YouTuber and Twitch streamer attention (and to shill NFTs, but that’s out of the scope of this particular write-up). It has absolutely no soul or effort put into it, and it’s designed very poorly, with its godawful controls, godawful collision, godawful map, and godawful fucking everything. It is yet another example of a soulless clone of a fantastic game that completely misses the point of its intricacies, message, and pretty much every design aspect that it exceled in. I wouldn’t pay a single cent to play this game, and neither should you. Avoid it, and go play Getting Over It instead if you want an actual fair and well-crafted challenge.

It’s been a long one, but let me just say: I’m glad you came.

Part 2 (highly recommended to read as well, as it contains corrections and additions that this post does not cover)